Talking to Kids About Tough Stuff... Like Homelessness

This week at MCC (if you haven’t heard) is all about Vacation Bible School! Wonder Woman, the Flash, Batman & Robin are introducing the children in our care to Bible verses and stories about Superheroes in the Bible like Jesus and Moses. This summer, I was invited to participate in our “Mission Center” (A.K.A., the Bat Cave) by teaching the children about some of my mission work.

I was given Monday and Wednesday to present to three age groups – ranging from 4 years old to fifth grade. How hard can that be? Heck, I’ve been involved with VBS since my 23 year old daughter was a little kid. No problem! Easy-peasy!

Today, the first day of VBS, I centered the conversation on the work our Senior PF did on our Chicago Mission trip. In my preparations, I kept returning to the issue of homelessness (you might have read about that in last month’s Steeple). Unfortunately, as VBS drew closer I ran out of prep time. Which led me to the unfortunate position of figuring it out on the gorgeous summer Sunday afternoon before VBS was to begin!

As the minutes ticked away I began to feel a creeping panic… exactly how do I talk to a four year old from Monroe about what it’s like to be a person experiencing homelessness? Will they get it? What is age appropriate? How do I frame the conversation without terrifying the child? And, how might the conversation shift when I would focus on older VBS participants?

For starters, kids of all ages need to know the appropriate terms. The younger ones couldn’t tell me what a mission was, but the older ones knew it had something to do with “helping people”. Then, we focused on a tent that I had set up as I told them about the tent cities of people experiencing homelessness in Chicago, and how our PF went to visit them and bring some bag lunches we had made. Not too many of the children had ever been camping, so we imagined what it might be like to live in a tent instead of a house. Where would we store food or take a shower?

Then, we talked about what they can do as a kid to help people. We brainstormed what we might put in a “blessing bag” to give to someone who needs help (with our parent’s supervision, of course). In the older group, we watched a short video of an 18 year old homeless man living in tent city and some of his struggles. And we talked about the importance of treating other human beings with dignity and respect.

What I didn’t share was Chicago’s statistics:

• Average age of a person experiencing homelessness is 9!

• There are over 80,000 people in need of permanent affordable housing

• On any given night, 2,000 youth look for a place to lay their head, but there are only 360 shelter beds to accommodate them.

• Today across our nation there are more Vietnam vets experiencing homelessness than were American casualties from that war, 1,000 of them live in Chicago

I told myself “they wouldn’t understand”, and maybe that’s true. To be honest, there is a part of me that knows I didn’t share the numbers because they make me angry. I’d rather be hopeful. Or maybe it’s because the numbers always remind me that we have such work ahead of us to really love our neighbors as we love ourselves.

OK, so Wednesday? That’s the day I share my sabbatical work, monitoring human rights violations in Jerusalem… with 4-11 year olds. Pray for me?

Young Adult Leaders in the Church... they exist!

Let no one despise your youth, but set the believers an example in speech and conduct, in love, in faith, in purity. (1 Timothy 4:12)
Mainline church, we've got a big problem. I don't need to repeat to you the statistics on failing and closing churches. In fact, I think that will do nothing but give you slight heartburn. I'm not going to contribute to that anxiety loop today.

I would like to name "Fear of Young Leaders" as one of the issues that is contributing to our slow demise. Here are some thoughts about how we got here:

We've assumed, for too long, a shallow understanding of the faith life-cycle. It goes something like this: Young people will leave the church as soon as they are confirmed, probably because we are too intellectual (aka boring). They will be back when they have children of their own that need Sunday school. In the meantime, we don't really count on them too much or expect them to contribute or even show up. And if they DO show up during those young adult years, we will wait until they are the respectable age of about 30 before we see them. Because young people are to be served, they don't really count.

Other things that contribute to this decline into shallowness include:
1. Expecting the right pied piper style, long-hair hippie youth director to "bring in the youth" based on their personality style and inability to age (no shade thrown at anyone that resembles this stereotype, but good luck to the youth ministry when you eventually move on!)
2. Having the best children's programming that magically draws in young families (hint: people are looking for authenticity in relationship, not perfection)

Both of these attitudes underscore our propensity to see our churches as a commodity to be consumed, rather than the body of Christ today in the world that call each one of us, no matter our age, to discipleship.

Mainliners, do you even know what happens when you let the church do what church should do and grow disciples? You get young leaders like this:

• 14 year old who decided to start a brand new photo booth at Strawberry Festival
• 17 year old trustee who will go over to the church to turn off lights and save precious stewardship $
• 18 year old deacon, who is very particular about the way we serve communion and will let you know (with love and grace) when you mess up
• 19 year old Vacation Bible School co-chairperson, on her second year of wrangling 20 volunteers and 60 children for a week in the summer
• 20 year old film student, responsible for documenting and sharing the vision of the church's spectacular Strawberry Festival
• 23 year old delegate to General Synod 31 who has served on the Christian Education Board, as Junior High adviser, as an area chair for Strawberry Festival and VBS co-chair - just to name a few
• Two Senior high youth advisers in their mid-20's, and another in his early 30's who lives an hour away that make Sunday nights with the senior high youth group a priority - it's hard to imagine a mission trip without them.(Oh, and these three have been leaders since they were teens, and have coincidentally taught me more about following Jesus than any youth ministry seminary course ever did.)

This is not an exhaustive list, but I am trying to make a point. If we want young adults to be in the church, we need to include them as equal ministry partners with adults - let's not settle for less. That includes our national setting. There should be no separation, no ageism. When we choose to infantilize 20/30 laypeople, we do so at our own peril. We stifle their discipleship. Do you think they'll care to come back in ten years when they are done cooking? They are not the "church of tomorrow", they are the church of right now. Let's treat them like it.